Who are you?

surreality. doubts. excitement. fears. dreams.

stretchmarks. linea negra. dark neck. dark underarms. flab. cramps. edema. dry hair. protruding navel. penguin walk. difficulty bending. heaviness. sleepiness. hormones. emotions.

dusters. baby stuff checklist. baby names suggestions.

check-ups. utz. anmun. vitamins.

moving. kicking. flapping. swimming. bulging. in. my. body.

who. are. you.

Baby items, what not to buy?

Dear fellow budget moms-to-be out there,

In this time of recession(global or personal :D), here are some buying suggestions you might find useful as I find them to be. I know that it's easy to be carried away by our mommihood euphoria into buying whatever looks cute and glam for our upcoming babies but let me remind you... there are more important things we have to save on like formula and diapers for our baby, education, shelter yada yada. So you may now recheck your one-meter long to-buy list and cross out some of the items or put a “can-wait” note. Best of lucks to all of us!

Baby items that will likely be unused/barely used

• Abdominal binder(Bigkis): Pedias don't recommend this because it's kulob and it may prolong the healing of the umbilical cord
• Baby sling/pouch: Many moms find it uncomfy and scary to use.
• Bath sponge: Because it's always wet, it's home sweet home to molds/bacterias
• Bath support net: Uncomfy and scary to use.
• Booties: Easily removed from the feet of the babies, socks more preferred
• Bottle warmers: Useless if you're exclusively breastfeeding
• Breast pump: manual pump is harder to use, much better if you'll invest in electric one but buy if already needed coz it might turn out you have nothing to pump after all :)
• Burping pads or Gauze cloths: One may replace the other
• Crib: Most moms find it natural to just co-sleep with their newborns maybe you will
• Formula dispenser: Useless if you exclusively breastfeed.
• Pacifier: Don't buy if you plan to breastfeed. Many babies also don't enjoy using this.
• Receiving blankets:
• Rubber mat: Most likely you'll realize that using diapers is more handy and comfy than using gauze diapers so eventually, you'll find no use of this.
• Small bath tub: Better buy the big ones so you can use it for longer time.
• Stroller: Many newborns like it better being carried manually, just buy if you're comfortable enough to carry them around and for your own good, buy the lightweight one.

Baby items you should buy little to none:

• Long sleeves/pajamas/frogsuits/swaddle blankets: Because it's always hot here in the Philippines, most likely your babies won't love being covered. If you will just buy few items then just add during rainy/cold seasons.

• Skin products (soap, lotion, shampoo, oil, etc.): Try first if it will not cause allergies to your baby or don't buy at all (some pedias advice against using them with newborns).
• Diapers: Just buy in bulk after the baby arrives, so that you'll know what size fits(some babies are born bigger for NB size) and if it's hiyang to your baby.
• Mittens: According to pedias, babies communicate through touch, just make sure you cut their nails short enough so as they don't hurt themselves when they scratch.
• Tie-side clothes: Hard to wear and unwear, just buy few. Don't splurge on NB sizes, babies grow up overnight
• Feeding bottles: Buy in quantities if you're sure you're not gonna breastfeed and you're sure it's hiyang to your baby otherwise just buy 2 or 3 pieces just in case.

Source: http://www.femalenetwork.com/girltalk/index.php/topic,188955.0.html

As Our Lives Collide

Every moment feels surreal. Like everyday I'm walking into a fog of dream-ish or nightmar-ish quality. Sometimes there's joy, there's excitement but often what's there is only fear, guilt, regrets of great palpability .

Surely, there is an ideal situation to what I'm having through... I have been waking up to these could have been's and what not's... I've already said my sorries to the one who is perfectly innocent of my carelessness, who deserve nothing of any of that.

Someday, I'll say these words unvaguely. Someday all my diziness and all my emotions will clear up and I hope nothing will remain but love.

Love. In its perfect solidity and pureness for the first time. Right now, it's just right here in my head but someday it will be filling my heart and my whole system.